How sad is it that this is the most exciting thing I could think to post about today? The adoption feels dead in the water. The rumor boards haven't even started humming about new referrals coming in yet. So, I'm guessing that means the next batch won't arrive for another week or two. Until then, there's not much to say. The current wait time is 20/21 months. If that were to stay the same, we would be receiving a referral in November/December. Of course, we know it won't stay the same..it will get longer than that during the course of the next year. Every month that passes, we get closer...every month that passes, the wait gets longer. This whole "one step forward two steps back" feeling is causing emotional defeat for me.
I saw a few people I haven't seen in a while this weekend. Each and everyone of them asked whether or not we were "still getting that Chinese baby?". To have to explain to everyone why we don't already have her with us and how we aren't sure when we will was down right painful. They were all well meaning people who were trying to show their sincere interest...I'm sure they had no way of knowing that their probing for information was causing me so much sadness.
OK, Benjamin just came in the office and gave me a totally unsolicited hug and told me how much he loves me. I feel better already. I look awful in this picture, but it was a moment worth saving...I guess this is how I'll survive the wait. No more complaining today!
6 comments:
Hang in there Mary. It is so hard...and I know all too well how hard it is when people probe. I've grown a pretty thick skin, but sometimes it cracks! :) What a sweet boy you have! He came at just the right time!
P.S. Congrats on alreaady getting your 2nd I-171H form! We're right behind you!
Yes, what a sweetheart Benji must be! You are a wonderful mom and that little girl will be getting the best home in the world as soon as they can get her to you. The waiting must be so hard, but you can pull through. And then one day you will wake up to the best news in the world and all that waiting will be just a memory.
What they say about boys it true....they love their Mamas. Like your friend Stephanie said you must be thick skinned. People will asked. They have no way of knowing your heartache.
You have the sweetest boys. Benji knew just what you needed. :) Hang in there Mary. Maybe it's time for another spa day? :)
Yes - Mary's boys are sooo precious. I agree with Mardi...I think it is time for another spa day and lets have riesling and cheesecake too
Cecilia's hubbie here.
Hoping it helps, I'm sending you virtual hugs, too. I admire your strength, and know that you'll make some lucky baby incredibly, incredibly happy.
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