I changed my ticker

I decided to change my "ticker" at the top of my blog. It used to show how long we've been waiting since "our formal approval". However, in the world of international adoption, "wait times" are counted from log in date to referral. So, I made a change.
How sad is it that this is the most exciting thing I could think to post about today? The adoption feels dead in the water. The rumor boards haven't even started humming about new referrals coming in yet. So, I'm guessing that means the next batch won't arrive for another week or two. Until then, there's not much to say. The current wait time is 20/21 months. If that were to stay the same, we would be receiving a referral in November/December. Of course, we know it won't stay the same..it will get longer than that during the course of the next year. Every month that passes, we get closer...every month that passes, the wait gets longer. This whole "one step forward two steps back" feeling is causing emotional defeat for me.
I saw a few people I haven't seen in a while this weekend. Each and everyone of them asked whether or not we were "still getting that Chinese baby?". To have to explain to everyone why we don't already have her with us and how we aren't sure when we will was down right painful. They were all well meaning people who were trying to show their sincere interest...I'm sure they had no way of knowing that their probing for information was causing me so much sadness.
OK, Benjamin just came in the office and gave me a totally unsolicited hug and told me how much he loves me. I feel better already. I look awful in this picture, but it was a moment worth saving...I guess this is how I'll survive the wait. No more complaining today!

Just one of those days

I should be cleaning my house right now. I started to, but kept stopping to come into the office to check my computer. I find myself doing this a lot lately. I just keep hoping there will be some bit of news to let us know we are moving forward. I spend much of my time these days feeling like something is missing. I just feel like she should have been home by now...we shouldn't still be waiting. WHERE IS SHE?! It'd hard to explain, but somedays (today would be one of them) I have an overwhelming feeling of sadness.

I decided to look at a blog that I check in on from time to time. The gal's name is Stephanie Wise. She is using the same agency as us and is logged in same month as we are. She's an artist and I plan on buying some of her art work for the nursery when we get closer to finishing it. Anyway, she had a link to this photographer's website on her blog. I went there and viewed some of the photos he has taken of girls who have been brought home from China. They are BEAUTIFUL!! He has their referral photo, and then pictures of them around 2 years old. I bawled my eyes out the whole time I was viewing the album.

Click on the link below, skip the prologue, then scroll to the bottom of the next page and click on "Some Babies Come by Plane". That should take you to the part of his website that has these precious baby girls.
http://www.davidclapp.com/

I guess I'll go clean and cry and pray for a peaceful heart and a calm mind.

The start of something beautiful...I hope!

So, at some point during the month of July I started working on the baby's crib bedding. I've just about got the bumper done. I've decided just to work on one piece at a time. Her room is a blank canvas right now. Doug is using it, temporarily, to store some of his computer stuff. Soon, I will give him his eviction notice and start turning it into an actual nursery. But, for now he can have use of it.

Anyway, it will take me a while to get all the bedding finished but that's OK. I'm having a good time doing it. Norah and Sarah came over the other day to help me attach the ruffle and the pipping. It's not easy to work on a sewing project with six boys running around the house, but we managed. Next time it will be just the three of us and a bottle of wine (well, not for Sarah..she's pregnant). I'll update the blog with photos as I go along. Here's some pictures of what I've got done so far!

Why "Baby Girl Schneider"?

Some of you may be wondering why we titled our blog, "Baby Girl Schneider". Well, I'll tell you. When Jacob was born, much earlier than expected, we were completely caught off guard. We hadn't gotten to that point in pregnancy where you really start to narrow down a name. To be honest, we hadn't even discussed it. So, for the first week or so of his life, he was simply called Baby Boy Schneider. Then when Benjamin was born, the same thing happened. Well, not exactly the same thing. Benjamin was born full term and there was really not excuse why Doug and I hadn't chosen a name for him, but we hadn't. So, he left the hospital under the name of Baby Boy Schneider. I named him after he was home for about a week (the hospital was not happy).
So, as tradition would have it (if you can call it tradition) we have yet to name our daughter. I'm sure, sometime after we meet her, we will chose a beautiful name that fits her just right. About the only thing we have talked about is the fact that we would like to incorporate her Chinese name into her given name. But, until that time, she will lovingly be referred to as Baby Girl Schneider!
Below are pictures of my two Baby Boy Schneider's...these photos were both taken before they had the names Jacob Alexander Schneider and Benjamin Grant Schneider. Aren't they precious?! Soon, we will have a beautiful referral photo to add to our collection.

A gift from Aunt Sarah

We received a surprise package today from my sister Sarah. She bought the baby a doll that speaks Chinese and English. Her name is Ling. Benjamin is already in love with her. I had to hide it from him. I guess it's cute that he's eager to learn some Chinese phrases, but if he keeps pushing on her tummy to make her talk she will be ruined before the baby gets a chance to play with her. TOO FUNNY!!

THANK YOU AUNT SARAH!!! xxoo

Our 16th Month LID Anniversary!

Today marks the 16th month anniversary of our LID (log in date). I could go for a glass of champagne...or a whole bottle for that matter!
July also marks the TWO YEAR anniversary of the start of our adoption journey! If we knew then what we know now we'd be......well, we'd be right here waiting for our sugarplum just like we are! So, I guess things are as they should be. Someday soon this wait will be a faint memory! We love you baby girl...we'll be coming soon!

Summertime Fun

Summer is in full swing. It's hotter than hot and we are basically living in the pool. Norah bought her boys over the other day for Lincoln's "cast off party". It's a little tradition that started with Jacob. After he came out of his cast (at age 1 1/2 mind you) we threw a party for him and all his friends who had been so nice to him while he was "crippled". Then, when Benji got his cast off we had one for him. So, we figured Lincoln deserved a little something special. So, the cousins got together to swim at my house and Pa brought over Push Up Pops!!! A perfect summertime treat.

It's official....

We received the following notice for our agency on July 6, 2007. This is latest batch of referrals. We don't expect another batch until the first of August. The next batch will start with families logged in on November 15, 2005 and move forward.

We are moving along...slowly but surely. We've decided to officially join the "Snail's Pace Running Club"!

The CCAA has updated the CCAA/Agency Info System and their web site
(http://www.china-ccaa.org/frames/index_unlogin_en.jsp) with the
following document processing news:

"Document Processing
The CCAA has finished the review of the adoption application documents
registered with our office before May 31, 2006.
The CCAA has finished the placement of children for the families whose
adoption application documents were registered with our office before
November 14, 2005."

All of Children's Hope May 2006 dossiers have been approved an have
moved to Department 2 at the CCAA. We are expecting referrals today
for our 11/8/05 log in date families. The CCAA has mailed referrals
for families with 11/8/05 through 11/14/05 log in dates. I will post
our referral summary information later today. Congratulations to our
11/8/05 log in date families and to all our other families who have
moved up in line!

My Pop Pop is gone

On June 18, 2007 my Pop Pop fell asleep in death. He was 82 years old. He was the only Grandfather I had ever known. He has been in my life for 35 years and will be deeply missed. I am his first granddaughter. I am grateful for that for many reasons, not the least of which is the fact that he was able to meet two of my children. Although my daughter will not have the privilege of knowing her great-grandfather, my boys do. Jacob can vividly remember Pop Pop taking him bowling and Benjamin remembers him as well.

My grandparent's have lived on the Eastern side of the United States most of my life, and we have lived on the West. However, they have managed to maintain a close relationship with myself and all of my brothers and sisters throughout our lives. The photo below was taken at my brother Dennis's High School graduation party (my Mother is in the middle). This was just one of their many journeys out West.

Once my Grandfather learned of our intentions to adopt, he took a vested interest. I can remember him and my Grandmother standing in my kitchen asking all kinds of questions about our adoptions process. After answering all of his questions, I received a smile of approval from him, and my Grandmother received a personal viewing of "China's Lost Girls".

I am deeply saddened that he will not be here to watch us complete our adoption journey. I am equally saddened for my cousins (who were so close to him), whose children he will never have the privilege of meeting.

I could create an entire blog to dedicate to him, but for now I will just let the world know (and my daughter) that my Pop Pop will be missed.

Thank you, Pop Pop, for loving us all unconditionally!! You are one of the bravest men I have ever known!