Snakes, snails and puppy dog tails!

I swear I have got to get a camera. My camera is "missing"! Jacob took it in the backyard a few weeks ago to make videos of himself and his friends jumping on the trampoline and wouldn't you know it....it's now gone. So, I have no pictures of my own to post, but if I did, today would have been a true Kodak day!

It's my cleaning day....I took me double the time it normally takes me because the boys are home and I was cleaning and talking on the phone most of the day (I LOVED talking to you today, Stephanie....sooooo excited). Anyway, here's how the day went.....

I kicked the boys out of the living room so I could mop the floors. I went down to my room for what felt like 30 seconds and when I came back down the hallway they had these two giant cardboard boxes from the garage sitting on their area rug (which I had just vacuumed) and they where making "secret hideouts" out of them. No big deal, except they didn't bother to knock all the leaves and junk off the bottom of them before they put them on the rug, so needless to say I had to bust the vacuum out again (this time they did the vacuuming). But, you should have seen how funny they looked sitting in their "hideouts" playing their Game cube. After a while I sent them outside to play.

The next thing I know I look out the front window and what do I see??? The boys had this broken scooter thing (it runs on batteries, has a seat and looks like a Lark) that my Dad brought over yesterday bunji corded to a bike. Jacob was peddling the bike and pulling Benji down the street on the scooter. It looked like something strait out of Napoleon Dynamite. I was dying laughing. It looked a little dangerous, but they were having fun. Fast forward two minutes....in comes Jacob carrying Benji with scraped up knees. He had apparently hit the brakes on the bike and the scooter went crashing into it.....bit shocker there!

After I nursed Benji's knees back to "working order" (he acted like he couldn't even hop let alone walk) I went back to my cleaning. I walked into the boys room to put away some folded laundry and feel something squish between my toes. I froze...said a quick prayer..and looked down to see what in the world I could have just stepped on. It was one of the many, many, many caterpillars Jacob had collected a few days ago. He had them in this bug collector thing that was supposed to be in the backyard. Apparently since it "got windy the other night" and he was afraid something would happen to them he moved them inside. Yeah something happened.....THEY GOT OUT!!!

Then I went to fridge to get myself something to drink (just water, in case you're wondering). I opened the freezer to get out some ice and found not one but two exploded cans of Coke inside. "Jacob" I yelled at the top of my lungs. He comes barreling out of his room where both him and Benjamin where frantically "cleaning up" the caterpillars. I held open the freezer door and just pointed at the mess. "Oh yeah...I put those in there last night so Benji and I could make slushies".

Seriously, I think this going to be a long summer. Doug came home a few minutes later and got them out of my hair. They went to the store to get a new battery for the scooter thing....more injuries to come I'm sure! Give me strength!

What will this summer bring?

I haven't been much for blogging lately, so I thought I should post a small update on our life. To be honest, not a lot has changed with us. The boys just got out of school for the summer and they couldn't be happier about it. They both did great this year...A's and B's on everything!

The weather here in Phoenix has actually been really nice. We've had a few hot days, but the evenings are still cool. We've been eating dinner out on the patio as often as we can.....soon it will be indoor dining only!! Jacob is outside right now with my Dad flying a kite (that's like heaven to him) and Benjamin is chasing them up and down the street on his new bike. So, needless to say their summer is off to a pretty good start. We are hoping to make it over to San Diego in July, but other than that we have no major plans! We'll just have to wait and see!

It's been a bit of an emotional week for me. At first I thought it was just PMS. Then last night Benjamin said something that pushed me right over the edge. I should have seen it coming, but....

It started with us selling my Expedition (you know you're getting close to loosing it when you want to cry over a car). The thing is, I've been picturing her, in her cute little car seat, in that car for two years. I know it sounds crazy, but that's the car I owned when we started the adoption and I just assumed it would be the one I would be driving when she came home. It's not, and that's OK, but something about the fact that she never even drove in it with us makes me so sad.

Then the last day of school came and I realized that we are facing yet another summer without our sugarplum. The worst of it is, I'm not convinced that it's going to be our last summer without her....next summer could very well be more of the same.

Then last night, Doug and I were enjoying some relaxing (and slightly romantic) time in the jacuzzi together when Jacob and Benjamin decided to hop on in and join us. So, there the four of us were..talking and laughing and hanging out when Benjamin looks over at me and says, "Mom I can totally picture you holding our baby sister right now." I instantly felt a pain in my heart and asked him, "Really...what does she look like?" He said, "She's cute and she's just a little bit bigger than Vienna." Then he laughed and reached for Jacob and the two of them started wrestling around in the water. I, on the other hand, did anything but laugh. In fact, I had to get out as quickly as possible so the boys wouldn't see me crying. It's like he read my mind. I picture her with us all time, but to hear him say it just broke my heart. It was "the straw that broke the camels back". I've been two blinks away from tears since then. Maybe it is just PMS...let's hope so.

I posted a picture of my niece, Vienna, because if that doesn't put a smile on your face I don't know what will!!

Referrals should be arriving any day now. I'll post the news as soon as I hear.

Please Keep China in Your Thoughts

So, Monday morning I'm driving home from dropping the boys off at school when Norah calls and asks me if I heard about the earthquake in China. "What earthquake?"

Sichuan province had just been hit with an earthquake. If you look on the map of China I have on the blog (right side) you can see where it is located. Chengdu is it's capital city. Sichuan is home to the famous Panda. It's a beautiful province and has many orphanages within it's bounderies.

The images on the news and the internet are almost too much to bear. The photo above is of some newborn babies who were being transported from one hospital to another.

There are reports coming in from many of the orphanges, but not all. From what I've read, there has not been any loss of life in any of them. Some have sustained considerable damage to their buildings and have had to move the children to temporary shelters such as tents, etc. But, most seem to have faired rather well. Many are in need of water, diapers and formula. Relief efforts are under way to assists these orphanages.

Some of the families who are in China right now completing their adoptions have emailed to report that they did feel the earthquake, but are OK. I can't imagine being over there with all of this going on.

Our 26th month LID anniversary came and went this weekend without much notice. The families who received referrals this month waited 28 months from their LID. Lucky them!!! I wish our wait would end at 28 months!

Please keep China, especially it's children, in your thoughts!

To see some of the relief work that Children's Hope International is doing in China right now, you can click on the link to the right under the heading "CHI's projects in China".

May Referrals!

Dear China Families,

The CCAA updated their information system on Sunday, May 4th with the following information about referrals.

The CCAA has finished the placement of children for the families whose adoption application documents were registered with our office before January 12, 2006.

Children's Hope did not have any log in dates for the 10th, 11th and 12th. Our next log in date is January 13, 2006.

This batch of referrals started with January 9, 2006. It was a three day batch. I had been checking in with the rumor boards last week, so I was pretty much expecting this. It's discouraging, to say the least. But, then again, three days is three days. It's better than two! There are 57 days left to match to get to us (we're the 57th day).

Referrals!!

Life has been busy, so I'm late in reporting the newest batch of referrals. They arrived last Friday! This batch of referrals matched families with log in dates of January 5th thru January 9th of 2005. A 5 day batch! Our agency had families logged in on January 6th, and the good news is they DID receive their referrals. This was a relief to all of us given the situation with our agency's "pending" Hague accreditation.

With all the anxiety this month has thrown at us, it was so nice to read the referrals announcements from these families. As always, we feel great joy for these families and for ourselves for having moved up in line!

Letting go...

Well, tomorrow marks the day that will change International Adoption (at least for many countries..China and the U.S. included) in a pretty significant way. After tomorrow any seeking to adopt a child from a country who signed the Hague Treaty, oh so many years ago, will need to be working with a Hague accredited adoption agency. Anyone who is already in the process of adopting will need to be working with an accredited agency in order to complete their adoption.

Towards the end of February a list of approved Hague adoption service providers was released and surprisingly our agency, Children's Hope International, was not on it. They had apparently been placed in a "pending" status by the COA (Council on Accreditation). Although they have been working, and will continue to work, diligently to become accredited it is appears that it will be months (maybe as late as early fall) before they will be in a position to request that the "pending" status be removed and approval given. If, at that time, they are not approved, we will be "transfer ed" to an agency that has already been approved in order to complete the adoption. At least that's what we are being told at this time. Many, many things are still up in the air...including whether or not our agency will continue to receive referrals for their clients while they are "pending". There is also the issue of families being able to renew necessary documents while their agency is pending. Only time will tell how all of this will be worked out and how it will effect our adoption, if at all.

I spent a great deal of time last week researching all that I could think to research, making tons of phone calls, sending tons of emails...trying to do anything I could to secure our position. Sadly, there's was little, in fact nothing, I could do to help our situation. So, I am forced to just "let go" for now. I have to trust that the Hague committee, USCIS and the CCAA will come up with a plan that will be in the best interest of all the children who are waiting for their family to come get them and the families who want so desperately to bring their child home. There has been so much change in the world of international adoption in the past few years that it is hard, almost impossible, to feel confident that all will OK. But, we are not alone and the chances that the adoption of so many people (our agency alone has 800 families logged in in China) will be ruined by policy changes, or the like, is probably pretty small. So, for now, it's time to sit back and see where all the cards will fall. We were told 2 1/2 years ago at our required course on adoption that, "International Adoption is very rewarding, but IT IS NOT EASY". The "not easy" part I get...I can't wait to see the reward!

P.S. On a funnier note...the boys and I were over at my sister-in-law's house on Saturday night and her daughter wanted to watch Annie the movie....so needless to say we were all sitting around watching it. I totally got emotional watching it!!! You know you are going through a bad spell when "The Sun Will Come Out Tomorrow" song gets you misty!! I'm still laughing at myself about it....Hopefully it was just the wine, otherwise I'm turning into a total sap!

What a difference a few days can make!

Last week was full of good things. We celebrated our two year LID anniversary, had a visit from our social worker to update our home study report, and had our 14th wedding anniversary! Doug and I spent the weekend celebrating our anniversary by eating out, going shopping, giving gifts to each other, going to the movies, laying by the pool...all of our favorite things! Life felt good!

This week, however, it feels as if the rug has been pulled out from under us. Due to circumstance beyond our control, our adoption has been placed in jeopardy. We are doing everything in our power to try to secure our position, but are uncertain as to how much of a positive effect our efforts will have on the fate of our family.

My heart goes out to all those families who, like us, are being faced with this uncertainty.